How Fragile I Am

This past weekend was a very awesome weekend. The Lord opened the opportunity for me to share the Gospel with 4 people. However, speaking honestly, though sharing the Gospel gave me a spiritual high, the after effects were not as welcomed. I must confess my biggest weakness in sharing the good news is myself. I must constantly refocus and put all my faith in Christ's work, not my own. I tend to feel very excited, but also very fearful that I might have said the wrong words. I tend to feel an awe about pointing people to the eternal God, but I also feel hopeless when I think about them not accepting His grace. I tend to feel disappointment, wishing that God would call them to himself right then and there, but they don't. However, I also have hope that someone else would reap what God allowed me to sow. I can only find one word to describe my state during and after sharing the Gospel. That word is fragile.

As I prayed, confessing my sin of unfaithfulness, asking him to help me understand all the emotional highs and lows, asking him to help me grow from the tension experienced and involved with sharing the Gospel. The Lord led me to think about clay jars. 2 Corinthians 4, takes us beside Paul as he is describing His ministry of sharing the Gospel and the hope therein. I could not help, but be comforted by Paul's words, as if he were writing to me. I was encouraged as follows:

1) Verses 1-2 tells me that the Gospel truth is to be presented simply and that it is nothing to be ashamed of.

2) Verses 3-6 tells me that if I do not see the Gospel penetrate into the lives of the hearer, I do not need to feel responsible for their rejection of it and that Jesus must continue to be the main focus.

3) Verses 7-12 tells me that I am fragile, but God has given me and all believers a treasure to behold and to share with others. The Gospel shows me that I am weak, but God is strong. That my goal is to be as John the Baptizer said, "He must increase, but I must decrease." (John 2:27-30).

4) Verses 13-15 tells me my only power and hope should come from Jesus' and that as I share I must keep focused on Him. That my goal in sharing God's grace with others is for them to have thankful hearts, so that God gets the Glory

5) Verses 16-18 tells me that all the negativity I experience should be compared to the Gospel to help me understand that this world and myself are not the goal. Heaven and being in God's presence is the goal, which is a promise God has provided through faith in Jesus Christ.

May God help me to be an effective and humble vessel to bring the Gospel to the lost. May God help convict in me that it is not by wisdom, nor by might, but by the Spirit of God (Zechariah 4:6). May God help me to see Him working and not myself.